I wish my mom or dad would have told me this growing up…

I wish people who live by this wouldn’t keep it so close to the vest…

I wish I hadn’t lived nearly half a century before I learned this very big life secret…


Life's Big Secret = It's NEVER about M


It’s never about me. 


We think that everyone notices us.

We think people care how we look.

We think that people want our ideas or opinions.

We worry and fret and spend endless time being concerned about something that we think the world sees in us.

Brett Butler’s last words to Scarlett O’Hara in the great classic, Gone with the Wind, “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a…” are the very words thought if not spoken by the average Joe or Josephine.

But you know… it’s okay.  


I wish I had learned these life secrets earlier in life


It’s more than okay.

You see, now that we know that people, in general, are all about themselves and not about you or me, at all, it totally frees us.

It gives you and me an opportunity to take advantage of them… in a good way. 

It also positions us to give people what they are desperate for….



Shhh..... Want to know one of Life's Big Secret's? It's not this one... there's another that will make you think for sure


More than anything else, people want attention.

So give them your attention.

Look for people to be the recipients of your lavish attention.

I bet you can think of someone right now. 


When you know LIFE'S BIG SECRETS you do life a little differently


This evening we got a visit from one of our little neighbors.

He always asks to play… just for 5 minutes.  He’s a natural negotiator, so if we tell him we’re busy with something, his immediate comeback is… “just one minute?”

And he won’t quit asking.  Oh, the question may not be the same… he’ll move on to a different topic… but at just seven, he’s a master of keeping his foot in the door and keeping our attention.  He’ll come up with any number of reasons or questions to garner our attention.

Not everyone is as adept or slick at getting and keeping our attention as Thomas… but everyone is as hungry for attention as a seven-year-old.


So now that you know one of life’s big secrets… what are you going to do about it? 


Click here for some ideas to get you going…


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  1. Wonderful post, Diane, and very insightful. It made me want to scream, ME ME ME ME ME 😉 but, that’s just me. You always give me attention in such a blessed way and I am so thankful for that. Here’s to my foot being in your facebook messenger door…..all the time! xoxo

    • I love that! Your foot in my FB Messenger door!! 😀 I love seeing you at my door. xo
      When I read, “me, me, me… ” I’m reminded of the seagulls in Little Nemo. 😉

      Thanks for the kind words, Mary Beth, you always bless me!!

  2. Minnie says

    Happy Thursday my friend,
    Its not about me…(you).
    This is something I pounded into my kids as they were growing up.
    No one will stand at you’re grave and say, I would have loved you if you colored your hair or had fancy clothes or followed what the world said was the latest trends. Nope. They will say I loved you because you were thoughtful of others, caring, giving, kind and loving to everyone around you. No one will care if you kept up with the Jones’s. Love others, don’t compete with them.
    My kids are all grown now, and I am able to see they did listen to momma after all.☺
    Blessings to you!

    • That’s the best Minnie… seeing that your kids are doing the very things that you believed were important. 🙂 Yay!!!
      Hope your weekend is extraordinary!! xo

  3. Malia says

    Great post Diane. My dad is great about spoiling his loved ones with attention not things. It makes you feel special to know that someone things you’re worthy of their attention!

    • Everything you’ve shared about your dad, Malia, makes me think he is an amazing man and a wonderful dad.
      Thanks for popping over and for your kind words. xo

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