Welcome to Day 28 of 31 Extraordinary Days to Be… Or…simply: Be…
Together, we will learn to Be… to live fully and beautifully in our “skin”
and in our homes and beyond. If you missed The Introduction or you’d like
to follow the entire series, you can find each post listed here.
When I embarked on this #31Days series, and chose Hospitality as one of the weekly topics, I had plans for all kinds of things hospitality-minded. But, as I began writing, I had an ‘Ah Ha’ moment. I needed that ‘Ah Ha’ moment and so did some readers. But….that totally turned my plans all upside down. (You can read about that here.)
Today I came across this phrase…
A perfectly kept house is the sign of a misspent life.
Mary Randolph Carter
Most of my thoughts on hospitality revolve around the home and opening our homes to others. I know the topic is much broader…but I think that it’s an area where we all struggle.
Yesterday we were invited to a home…
A home where there’s a small kitchen renovation in process. And the family dog is entering his final life stage. Yet, the hostess still invited friends for Sunday lunch…two soups and a chicken salad. We brought the dessert. The gathering was small…just three couples as one couple had a health issue that change their plans last minute. The kitchen island was filled with kitchen stuff and the walls were spotted with wall patch. The hostess had a fall tablecloth which needed to be ironed…her comment, not mine.
It’s clear to you that I noticed all these imperfections. How could I not? The food was being served buffet style from the stove and counter. I ate on the table with the window pane folds in the cloth. But it did not matter. Not one bit.
Instead the guys enjoyed watching and talking football, all of us had fun playing Sequence, and we ate some really good food. The Pasta Fazool was so good, that I need to get the recipe to share with you. It was relaxing. It was good to hang out with friends, new and old. And I was reminded of one of the reasons for being hospitable.
Community.
Most of us are on the go. We share brief encounters with lots of people during our day. But, do we do life together? Do we experience community?
Sure we can eat Sunday lunch and watch the game by ourselves in our own homes. Alone. Or we can throw some food together and invite some other couples or families to join us.
There might be any number of reasons for our homes to be less than perfect. But if we camp on our imperfections we lose. Our missing guests lose.
Whether we want to admit it or not, in spite of our busyness, most of us live in isolation. No one ever comes to our homes. Disagree with me if you wish….but generally it’s because we don’t think we measure up to some made up standard. Excuses come to the surface like, the rug/carpet needs to be cleaned, the sofa is worn, I’m not a good cook, I can’t afford to buy more food, I’m too busy, my house isn’t big enough, etc., etc..
Excuses! I know…I’ve made more than my share.
I’m reminded of the verse where it says that God looks at our hearts not our outward appearance.
That’s the thing with hospitality. Being hospitable is a heart issue. It’s about blessing others. It isn’t about performance or show. It’s about love. Loving others.
Are you football fan? Invite someone to watch the game with you.
Are you going to eat a meal? Invite someone to eat with you. (And if they ask what to bring…let them bring what works for them…maybe what they were going to serve for that same meal at their house.)
Are you going to go for a hike? Call someone to join you.
Are you going leaf peeping? Invite someone to ride along.
All of these things are better in community.
Analyzing the game is more fun with others, communion is bread broken together…a meal shared, exploring the world is more interesting when you have more eyes to spy the wonders around you.
Who wants a misspent life? Not me. Not you.
Let’s love others with abandon. After all…when it’s all said and done….it’s one of the only two things in life that really matter.
Day 28 Challenge: Do you live life in community? If yes…what’s your motivation? If no….what are your obstacles? You may have a big extended family and do life within your larger community of family. Do you invite others to join your family gatherings? If not…why not? This week…invite someone to join you at your home doing something. No excuses…except if someone has a contagious disease at your house.
Don’t be guilty of leading a ‘misspent life.’ Instead….be.. hospitable loving.
I appreciate you and your sweet comments make my day.
Diane
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Sharing at these Extraordinary spots:
Cozy Little House + Yesterday on Tuesday + My Uncommon Slice of Suburbia + Cedar Hill Farmhouse – The Scoop + A Stroll Through + Home Stories A to Z + Our Home Away from Home + A Bowl Full of Lemons + Elizabeth & Co. + Carolyn’s Homework + Savvy Southern Style + The DIY Dreamer + Whimsy Wednesday + Clean & Scentsible + DIY by Design + We Are THAT Family
KUDOS to the hostess ! 🙂 First of all the guys would not have noticed ANY of that. Having raised 3 sons, I know that. And secondly, whenever one visits a LIVED-in home, one instantly relaxes and feels that THEIR home doesn’t have to be perfect, either 🙂
As to Blog Land, I recently saw a post about a laundry room finish and the blogger took all of her laundry soaps etc off the shelves for the pictures. Enough said., LOL!
I appreciate your sentiments, Deb. 🙂 You are so right…a ‘lived-in’ home really does allow a guest to relax. 🙂 And Blog Land…. 😀 …over the top. [wink]
Thanks for stopping by!!
[hugs]
WOW! This really spoke to me. I printed the picture and it’s on the wall by my computer. Thanks, Diane.
This was a hard post to publish, Judy. It means a lot to know that it spoke to you. Thanks for letting me know. 🙂
[hugs]
Oh good, mine is certainly not perfect. Love this. Thanks tons for linking to Inspire Me. Hugs, Marty
Your home might not be perfect….but you make it an amazingly welcome spot. 🙂
[hugs]
Diane
So neat that this was today’s post. We just experienced a similar dinner tonight. Bob was sitting on our rather large front porch. Our next door neighbors were coming in from work and Bob called out and asked if they could sit a spell. They walked over, I went out and we rearranged rockers. Just then our neighbor, on the other side, who was recently widowed came around the side of her house. We called her over and as we were all hugging someone suggested pizza, I ordered pizza. We made an impromptu salad and had the most fun dinner I have experienced in years.
I had been out for the day. We moved a few things off the table, pulled out the leaf and enjoyed the fellowship of friends. I suspect, our Lord knew what we all needed tonight.
God is good,
Thanks for your writings I enjoy them so much,
Ginger
Ginger…your story just put the biggest smile on my face. 😀 Thank you for taking the time to share it.
Isn’t it amazing how wonderful an impromptu gathering of friends and neighbors can be?
God is good.
Thanks for your kind words of encouragement. [hugs]
~Diane
Savannah Granny sounds like the best kind of neighbor to have.
I agree, Stacey!!! We all need to be the neighbor that Ginger is. 🙂
“but generally it’s because we don’t think we measure up to some made up standard..”
Maybe I’m the odd duck out with this one. I don’t know that it’s so much to do with ‘not measuring up’ in a physical sense. My home (note the MY) is “my kingdom”. It’s all about me and the spouse and the kiddo and the small bug person. Admittedly, it’s not a candidate for ‘House Beautiful’…but it’s comfy and we’re surrounded by things that matter to us. Therein lies my resistance to others coming into MY kingdom. Things will look like they really ARE and you’ll know what matters to me and I’ll be ‘exposed’. I panic when we have unannounced guests cuz stuff is all over–and I’m not talking ‘neatness’. I’m kinda freaky in the neatness department. I’m talking ‘my heart is everywhere’ in this house.
Yup–LOL I think I’m definitely the odd duck out in this one.
And so you know–absolutely NO effort to involve someone in an activity, have ’em over for a bbq on the patio, colour on the sidewalk with me, treat ’em to pizza/dinner out, etc…. Fact is, I ‘fudged’ on my ‘hospitable’ bit and invited a gal to join myself and he-who-does-the-driving to go take a tour of the trees with us. That stuff is easy peasy for me. *laughing* Odd duck, I know! And yes, I do get professional help! 😉
“Odd duck” you. 🙂 Truly you make me smile Mel. I think that you are more in touch with yourself than most of us. You are confident in who you are. Many of us are concerned that people won’t like us when they discover the ‘real’ us. Silly. But true. Yes…I am more about hospitality coming from the home. But…inviting someone on a color tour is a great thing. It’s about spending quality time and loving on someone and your friend was the lucky one for sure!!! 🙂
I’m guilty of not inviting others over because I’m embarrassed by our small home with the stained carpet (three kids and a dog). Great encouragement to “get over” that and deepen some relationships.
Audra…thank you so much for letting me know this post was helpful to you. I do hope you find freedom in focusing on others and loving and blessing them. It really does change the game.
Wishing you An Extraordinary Day!!
~Diane